Mom's Carelink is a ministry of First MB Church that provides encouragement, friendship and wisdom from a Biblical perspective to equip women for their role as mothers of children from birth through the school years.

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Wednesday, October 5, 2011

React or Respond

Here's something worth reading from Jill Savage at Hearts @ Home. Hearts at Home is a great resource for moms. Jill has written many books and they have blogs, newsletters and annual conventions. I was able to attend a conference a couple years ago with our former Carelink Coordinator, Tina Yutzy. It was great! Here's a link to their site, http://www.hearts-at-home.org/.  ~ Tiffany

It's usually when I find myself speaking to my kids through clenched teeth that I realize it:
I just reacted when I should have responded. What's the difference? A lot, actually.
When I react, my child is in charge. When I respond, I am in charge.
One thing I've learned after 26 years of mothering is that things are usually better in a family if mom and dad are calling the shots rather than the kids. But even knowing that, sometimes my emotions just get the better part of me. Do you know what I mean?
If I'm honest, however, it's usually because I'm too distracted or too tired to appropriately lead my kids. That's a tough pill to swallow, but it's true.
What I've learned is that I can move from reacting to responding with three small but effective changes:
  • Increase margin: When I cram too many activities into too little time, it's a recipe for disaster.
  • Lower expectations: When my perfectionism kicks in, I'm no fun to live with.
  • Expect the unexpected: When I expect that life will throw its curves, I handle it better.
A good friend once said, "Every once in a while, life is smooth sailing...then there's the rest of the time." The more I understand that statement, the better I handle all that real life and real mothering throw my way.
React or respond? I'm working on responding. Want to join me?
Joining you in the journey,

Jill
Wife of Mark
Mom to Anne, Evan, Erica, Kolya, and Austin
Nana to 17-month-old Rilyn

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